Boys

I took these pictures of the boys at two totally different times during the day. I was amazed when I downloaded them and compared them at the similarities in poses!

First smiles! The start to the smile.

The big grin.

Girls

The girls love to dress alike.

The other day I had wonderful intentions of getting out of the house so I got everyone dressed...

...but we never made it anywhere!
Oh well, I gave myself an A+ for effort!

Zoo

Yesterday we decided we would make the most of the day and we headed to the Philadelphia Zoo. My goal was to leave by 9 a.m. to be there when they opened and we left by 9:15 a.m. I felt pretty good about that!

Ella loves animals! She was so excited. Andy showed Ella the gorillas. There was a mother with two very young babies. So cute!

Train ride!

Pretty tile mosaic.

In the children's section the kids can brush and pet the goats and sheep. Ella was not interested in touching them. I'm pretty sure she was freaked out that she was eye level with a goat.

Lilly loves the zoo. I took her many times when she was 2 and 3 years old. This is as close as Ella would get to this goat.

Checking out the donkeys.

We bought each of the girls a pony ride. I was sure Ella would not ride and she was also saying, "Nooooo." I told Andy we would let Lilly take two rides. When we were standing in line one of the ladies who works there spoke to Ella about the pony and Ella immediately put her arms up! The lady picked her up and put her on a pony and off they went. I stood there in total shock.

Ella went with a stranger AND got on the pony!

This guy was awesome. He was such a gentle soul.

Lilly loved her ride on Lulu.

We had a great time. We did a lot of feeding, changing, feeding and changing but that's to be expected with newborn twins. I have found that if I have the attitude that everything is going to take much longer then I handle it all in stride when we do have to stop over and over again.

Momma Said...

Momma never said there'd be days like this!

Happy Babies

DYFS

I fear I will be meeting with the Department of Youth and Family Services today.
I'm actually very serious.

Lilly played from 10 a.m. until 6 p.m. yesterday.
Lilly cannot hang that long. I know that. She likes her downtime. When Andy walked in the door at 6 p.m. after taking the girls to the pool he said, "Lilly's in the car crying." Ella was saying, "Lilly wying Lilly wying." I went to his car and she told me she wanted to walk home from the pool and Daddy didn't let her. There have been a few times when I let her walk home from the pool and I drove next to her slowly. She feels all grown up and it makes her very happy. Apparently Andy wasn't feeling it so I made a decision to drive her back to the pool and let her walk home.

This is what a happy Lilly looks like.

This is an unhappy Lilly.

This is a very unhappy Lilly.

As I drove Lilly back to the pool she was "very unhappy Lilly" sobbing and telling me that Andy had tricked her and put her in the car and driven her home. She could not pull herself together and I should have just driven her home. But nooooo, I took her to the pool parking lot and let her get out. A lady was walking her dogs and watching the whole thing. I did think for a second how this must look... 4 year old sobbing, getting out of the car, still sobbing, and walking home. I was driving next to her and talking to her through the window. She asked if she could take the short cut and I agreed. She cut through our friends' yard to ours and I watched her as she did it then I drove around.

When I pulled in the driveway Lilly was sitting in our yard with a strange woman. I got out of the car and the woman approached me asking me if I was Lilly's mother. I told her I was and that Lilly was overtired from a long day of fun. She then told me that Lilly was seen being left at the pool to walk home alone. I smiled and told her what really transpired and that I was driving next to her the entire time. I told the lady I saw the dog-walker at the pool and I also saw her at her front door watching Lilly cut through. She glared at me and left our yard.

I came inside wondering how everything went so wrong. Then I told Andy I was sure DYFS would be called and be paying me a visit.

I was thinking of all the things I could do/say when they're here...
At least I got a good chuckle.

Freedom

The hardest part (for me) of doubling our amount of children has been feeling like a prisoner. I like to get up and go. The girls and I usually went out at least once a day and it has been very difficult for me to sit home and feel I cannot go out logistically!

Today, I decided we'd go to Target. We needed diapers. Of course I could have waited until Andy came home from work. I could have asked a friend to join me. I could have taken my friend's daughter with us to help push a cart. But I wanted to know I could do it alone. After all, this is our new normal, right!?

The girls were great.
Lilly was very helpful. She put items under the cart for me and was a very good listener (popcorn bribe).

I wore Luke.
Gabe went in the cart.
Ella sat in the cart.
Lilly stood on the edge of the cart.

We were only gone an hour and I needed a big coke from McDonald's when we were done (I was soaked in sweat: hormones + Luke on chest + leaking right boob + nerves) but it's a start!

I'm also feeling better today because last night Andy took Luke and slept in another room and I slept in a room with Gabe. It was the first night I haven't been up all night nursing/changing/burping/swaddling both babies all night long. One baby felt easy!! I know it was a big change for Andy since I've always been happy to do nighttimes on my own but I was beginning to crack. As hard as it was to admit I needed help in the night it was a big relief when it worked out beautifully (though I'm sure Andy's tired).

For now, we'll do what it takes to get through one day at a time.
I think we can do this after all.

New Normal

Today is our first day of normal.
Our new normal.

Andy started back to work today and I am left to face the world on my own.
I'm scared.
It's 11 a.m. and everyone is happy and alive. That's a start!

I haven't raised my voice. I reverted back to teacher talk where everything is happy and I'm in my happy place. This new normal is going to take some time to get used to! There is no downtime. I loved my downtime. I feel like I'm running a daycare. Ha.

Anyway, here is what the boys are doing...

Us girls; we're doing some finger painting...

...and coloring!

Lilly is still struggling with our new family dynamic. I thought she could express her feelings through art. Eventually she did. She told me she was drawing a picture of just Mommy and Lilly and no one else. She said it was her real family. (Sniff, Sniff) I went with it and told her it was great. She even tried to write 'Best Friends' on top.

Sweet Gabriel

Sweet Luke

Making Our Way!

We're still here! I hope I can resume blogging soon.

Not that anyone else cares but I like documenting our days for the kids to read later in life (if they really care).

Luke

Gabe

The boys are great.
They eat like champs but are not gaining quite as much as they should be so we're adding a couple ounces of formula after each nursing session. Needless to say I am spending a lot of time feeding them!

Lilly is still adjusting and I truly believe that next week when we are back to our daily routine and I am on my own (ahhh!) she will find her groove again and start getting excited about school!

Ella is Ella. Sweet, funny, hysterical dancer, loves her sister and baby brothers, and happy happy happy.

On Sunday I had a photographer come to the house to take pictures of all the kids. I know she got some great shots of the boys and some good individual shots of the girls. I am not so sure she got any good shots of the girls together or all four kids together but that's alright! Here is one she sent me...

Lilly has her 4 year old crazy grin going on in the picture. I know one day I'll look back and remember all the times I spent saying, "Smile normal! Smile pretty!" Hee hee. I can't wait to get all the pictures back so we can choose which we'll purchase. I loved the photographer (Nicole) and will share when the pictures are finished being edited!

Here's a tease that I took with my cell phone while she was shooting pictures (shame on me):

Life

We're surviving!

Life is different, that's for sure.

It's a wonderful change.

Lilly is having the hardest time adjusting. She loves her brothers but her world has definitely been shaken. She's having some anger toward everyone but the boys. We are trying to be very understanding and reassuring.
We know she'll love her big family.

Andy has been a life-saver.
He has done it all... laundry, cleaning, baby duty, big kid duty, baths, pool...

I have been recovering and adjusting to a lack of freedom that I am used to.
I love my kids and my husband (but I also love to get sleep!!).

Ella has not seemed fazed by her new brothers. I was the most worried about her!

They are very good boys. They like to eat. A lot.

Today Andy had to go into work. I am doing it alone and I feel good.
I can do this (I think) and it will be wonderful.