Life

So much to say. So very much to say.

But first things first...

How darn cute is she? And that face she's making? Gosh, I'm such a sucker.

It's been three days since my computer last worked. I feel like a new woman. I have to give a huge shout out to Apple. They are an AMAZING company. Really, I am constantly floored by their customer service. I have been there six times in the last 2 months. I have received 2 brand new chargers ($100 a piece), a new battery ($100 +), a new keyboard (who knows how much), and a new faceplate (again, no clue)... ALL FREE and no, I'm not under warranty anymore. They are generous. They want me to be happy. They are friendly. They clean my computer and fix anything that's not working 'up to speed' as far as I'm concerned. They've never charged me a dime. I don't know why but I love them so much for it. Oh, and they have kiddie computers that Lilly can play on which is a triple quadruple bonus.

In other news, both girls have been sick. Lilly has a bad cold (which triggers asthma and nebulizers) and Ella has a cold and an ear infection. Fun times.

And finally, something has me very very twisted. I can get myself totally bent out of shape in an instant over it. I've done a lot of self-talk to get over it but just typing this is getting me all sweaty again.

Lilly received her "Welcome to Preschool" letter from her teacher last week. It's a total trainwreck. See exhibit A, B, and C below...

I can't get over it. I've actually prayed over this. If I don't change my attitude it will surely be a long, long 14 years that I have ahead of me. I have to somehow accept that not all teachers are as conscientious as I was. It doesn't reflect her passion for educating my precious child (choke, sputter, ahem... see I sort of think it does reflect her passion or lackthereof but I'm trying to say the right thing here and then believe it).

I just keep obsessing over the fact that 1). the director must not know what they send home, 2). this is a form letter written 30 years ago and literally cut and pasted each year, 3). it looks like utter shit and no one seems to care, and 4). I feel like your work is a reflection of you and if this is a reflection of Lilly's first schooling experience I am already not happy.

Ok there, I got it off my chest. I'm supposed to feel better now. I'm going to go have a little conversation with the good Lord above and see what I can work out. It may involve a prescription of some sort. I'll let you know...

Don't Try This At Home

We are not signing Lilly up for gymnastics this year. Or the circus. I don't think my heart could handle it.

Feeding

Apparently Lilly's baby was hungry.

Personality

Ella's changing drastically. All of a sudden she's becoming a little person with quite a personality! She's so adorably funny. She makes funny scrunched up faces and places chase. She giggles and she warms my heart so much. I chase her around her room and she crawls as fast as she can. Then she stops, sits, looks at me, grins, and takes off chasing me. All of a sudden I feel like we're actually communicating. It's fascinating and beautiful. She's interactive and I love it!

Here's her new face though she's smiling. When she's not smiling it's much more scrunched and it makes me giggle.

Ella says "Bah bah" and waves her whole arm. She doesn't open and close her hand. She also still says, "Ma" but only when she needs something or wants me. She's shy and cautious. She's standing on her own for several seconds at a time and then gets very excited knowing she just did something really special.

She's changing daily and it's so much fun being along on this ride. I can't wait to see what tomorrow brings!

3 and a half...

Lilly is 3 1/2 years old. I cannot believe it. She's a preschooler. Not a toddler. Not an infant. Not a newborn. All these phases they pass through. So wonderful, yet so sad. I strain my brain trying to remember her at all of the stages and at different ages. I look back through her pictures daily. My little baby girl is growing up. And I love her so very much. Sometimes I can't believe how much love we are capable of feeling for our children. It's amazing.

Lilly is a lovely little spunky spitfire. She doesn't know a stranger. She is loved by everyone. She has a dynamic and invigorating personality. She breathes life into me. Daily. Lilly is the life of the party. She's helpful and curious. She's independent and strong. She's competent and sensitive. Lilly makes people smile.

Lilly's an envelope-pusher. She loves a thrill. She's cautious yet fearless. She's very coordinated and so observant. She's a great big sister. She's our little love.

I can't believe she's 3 1/2. We celebrated her half birthday with a cake and a cupcake. Lilly was very excited. She waited all day long for her cake and was very patient.

Jackie broke the rules and brought her a few little gifts. I especially loved this one...

In just a couple (short!) weeks Lilly will be starting preschool. I'm already anxious but feel (this time) she's ready. She's anxious to learn. She's excited. She's growing up and it's a beautiful-difficult thing to watch.

Lilly, we love you so much! You bring happiness into our lives and are a constant ray of sunshine. Happy half birthday sweet girl.

H1N1

I will post later tonight about Lilly's half birthday. For now I am going to sit here and panic about the Swine Flu.

Lilly has asthma and is starting school. I have asthma. Ella's a baby. Andy's had a very rough year with respiratory illnesses and now works in a lower elementary (pre-K to 3rd).

Today I will sit here and work myself up into a total frenzy.

Maybe I'll also play with my kids or take a shower. Just maybe.

Happy Half Birthday!!!

Today, our big girl Lilly is 3 and 1/2 years old. I can't believe it. I can relive her arrival like it was yesterday.

Tomorrow I will blog about our little celebration and all about our spunky and wonderful 3.5 year old.

Photoshop

I have been anxiously awaiting time to spend learning how to use Photoshop. I couldn't even figure out how to import a picture for weeks. So last night I set out to learn something. I figured out how to import a picture and I tried 2 different strategies that photographers have shared on their blogs.

This is a picture of Ella SOOC (Straight Out Of the Camera).
Here I enhanced her eyes (I did not change the color but adjusted the contrast and saturation). I also practiced darkening the edges of the photo.
This was a picture I snapped that I had no intention of using but found it was a great picture to practice with! Lilly put on Ella's headband while she was sitting in time out. This is the SOOC picture.
Here I intended to fade the color in the picture and enhance just the pink flower and her eyes. I have always wondered how people do that and I figured it out. I realize she's a bit ashen but again, I was just playing around with the flower and eyes.
I had so much fun playing around. And now, I'm officially excited. Unfortunately I do not have enough time in the day to dabble with pictures but I will try to learn little things here and there and apply them when I find the time.

Resist

I'm at it again...

...sometimes I just can't control myself.

A Bug's Life

As I've mentioned before, we're not a bug-killing family. Daddy especially doesn't kill any bugs. Lilly and I are very good about letting them outside unless we're in danger of being bit/stung.

Today, while I was in the shower, Lilly went on a bug hunt. Maybe it was her inner-bug-killing instinct that kicked in. I'm really not sure. But when I got out of the shower she announced, "I kill bug all by myfelf. Him fweepy and needed to west and take a nap and be fwiet." She then presented me with this...

I felt like I was going to burst into hysterics. Do you ever have a moment where something just tickles you so much that you don't think you can keep your laughter in? Well that's what happened when I saw that she'd killed the bug with Andy's old ID badge. There lay this dead bug, feet straight up in the air, by Andy's picture and over top his name. Just writing this is cracking me up all over again. It's so ironic. The dead bug, the anti-bug killer, Andy's picture, Lilly's response, the fact that she actually took it outside to "release" it...

I'm sure you had to be there to really get the full picture. Every time I look at the pictures I laugh. Maybe you will too.

Lilly Swimming

Andy's been taking Lilly to the pool a lot this summer and she has become very comfortable in the water. Yesterday I was watching her in the pool and decided to give her a little instruction with her arms and legs and she started swimming!! It's the very beginning of learning to swim but she came a looonnnnggg way in one short summer. Just 8 weeks ago she was nervous, cautious, and stayed in the baby pool or on the steps. On the 4th of July - just 6 weeks ago - she was afraid to reach into the baby pool to get a coin on the bottom. Now she's swimming! We're so proud of our little girl!

The 24th

In 5 days...

...Lilly will be 3 1/2 years old. I can't believe it. We will celebrate her half birthday with half of a cake. She's very excited.

9 Months

Happy 9 month birthday sweet girl!

I still can't believe how quickly the time is passing. You are such a neat little girl. You love your momma so much and don't like anyone (other than Daddy) to hold you. You are serious. You smile and laugh but Mommy has to work hard to get you to laugh! You'll sit and examine a toy or watch your sister play. You are crawling, cruising, standing while holding on to something, and walking while pushing a toy. You are not in a hurry to walk. You are calm and so far you're not mischievous (thank goodness!). You love to eat. You eat everything we give you except bread. (That blows my mind. My child doesn't like bread???)

We love you so much. You are amazing. I cannot imagine life without you. When I look at you and Lilly together my life feels complete.

Happy Birthday baby girl!

Sunflowers

I have always loved sunflowers. There's just something about them. In fact it was the flower of our wedding. We had sunflowers on each table and large sunflower arrangements on our deck and in the park for the ceremony.

Andy is very sentimental (believe it or not) and when he's not completely crazy with too much on his plate with work and his doctorate, he will think about me and what I like and then discreetly, and without a word, he'll do something sentimental. Then in true Andy fashion, he'll never even mention that he did it for me or us, etc. And we usually don't discuss it but I know in my heart why he did what he did. I find it very touching.

At some point he bought sunflower seeds. He never told me when or why but they sat on the kitchen counter for a while. And then one day he and Lilly went outside and planted them.

We recently had our first sunflower bloom. Lilly and I were so excited!

We also have crazy New Jersey dinner plate hibiscus that I wanted and now I complain about all the time because it's taken over our yard. But, I must say, the blooms are pretty amazing. They're hanging out next to the sunflowers.

And this picture wasn't altered at all; it's SOOC (Straight Out Of the Camera). That is the actual color of the blooms. Pretty amazing. And check out the bokeh...

Cruisin'

New Jersey... the state of trash-picking. Did you know that trash-picking is common and accepted by even the wealthy where we live (albeit illegal I believe)? It has taken me years to accept this very odd "hobby" (to some) but alas I have grown used to it and have even been on the receiving end twice.

When Andy and I were dating he called me at my apartment to tell me to "hurry" because he was picking me up to look at a piece of furniture he saw curbside in Haddonfield. I was excited but nervous. It was my first go at trash-picking. I was too embarrassed to get out of the car so I gave him the thumbs up, shrunk down in my seat as he loaded a dining room corner cabinet into his truck and off we went.

Last Friday night Andy arrived home from work with another item picked from someone's trash (they actually put trash on the curb so that people will take it). This time he hit the jackpot!

It's a Barbie Beach Jeep Wrangler and it's even a Special Edition. It once retailed for over $300. And it was free. It looks like new. Andy and Lilly immediately headed out to Toys R Us to get a battery and charger while I scrubbed it down. Then Lilly proceeded to test drive it until 9:30 at night! She loved it.

The weekend was spent driving the Jeep. All the neighborhood kids have driven and/or been a passenger in the jeep. Kids of all ages; 8 months to 12 years old. They've all had fun in Lilly's new Jeep. Even Ella took a spin with her sister.

It's really cool. Lilly's been all over the neighborhood in the Jeep. It's so cute to watch her drive a car her size. And she's gotten very good at maneuvering the Jeep. She and Andy went all the way around the block and we took both kids to the park to feed the geese. Lilly drove, Ella rode in her stroller, and Andy and I walked.

Santa brought Lilly a beautiful new pink kitchen for Christmas. She never plays with it. Andy brings home a Jeep from the trash and she's played with it nonstop for 4 days.

I Love This

Five Years

Five years ago today two hurricanes converged on our area. Hurricane Charley decided to join Hurricane Alex and Tropical Storm Bonnie and drop 2 inches of rain on our wedding day. I had always dreamed of being married outside. We planned to marry at the park and have our reception in our back yard. And this is what it looked like when I woke up. I was devastated.

But that didn't put a kink in our plans.

My dad still walked me down the aisle.

And you were still there waiting for me.

And we still exchanged vows and had our first married kiss.

And we began our journey together right there, hand in hand, in the rain.

And we danced to our song; in the rain.

And it was a wonderful day. The rain made it that much sweeter.

Thank you for walking with me on this journey. We've accomplished so much together in five short years and I cannot wait to see what's waiting for us in the next five.

I love you.

Gloss

Today we headed to Marshall's to do a little browsing. Lilly had her eye on a 6-pack of princess lip gloss from the moment we entered the store. She let me look around (I love, love, love browsing stores like Marshall's and never do) for a good hour so I obliged and bought the lip gloss.

She was very quiet on the ride home. She was busy exploring her new make up. She was also apparently very busy applying it as well. Then she passed out.

How cute is that?

*Ella was with us as well. She just sat in her carrier and smiled. She's way too easy.

Hierarchy

Our lives are changing.

Ella's mobile.

Lilly's jealous.

There's a lot of whining, crying, nannynannyboobooing, and general egocentrical 3.5 year old behavior going on around here.

And it ain't easy. That's all I'm sayin'.

From the outside looking in they're sweet, and cute, and matching, and loving.

And there truly is love there. Ella loves (and fears) her big sister. Her whole face lights up when she sees her. And Lilly loves (and tortures) her baby sister. It's the first thing she tells strangers... "This my baby sister Ella Wose! Her my baby." But Lilly's world has been shaken. There's someone on her turf that's moving. And she's getting a lot of attention for moving. And she's touching Lilly's things. And sometimes it's cool but other times it's just not.

But Lilly's smart. She knows it won't fly if she yells at Ella or says mean things. We don't do mean.

Oftentimes she takes matters into her own hands (which drives me insane).

Lilly loves her baby sister. But she also loves her old toys. And she knows what it takes to get them to herself.

Sick

My computer had to spend the night in the Apple hospital. It's heartbreaking. I am hardly breathing. I set out to do a blog post from our downstairs PC but I just cannot do it. The pictures that I downloaded came up on some viewer that I cannot manipulate and I can hardly even find them. I'm too frustrated and I am giving up. I should have my laptop back sometime today. Then, and only then, will I update my blog with pictures.

Skating

Lilly decided she wanted to skate over the weekend. She went and got her skates out of the garage. They require shoes so she put on slippers and then the skates and set off for a naked skate (the child wants to be naked at all times). At one point I said, "You better be careful because if you fall you're going to bust your hiney" and she said, "I need a diaper!!" So we put on a pull up (which after being potty trained for months she thinks is hysterical) and added a dish towel to the back for extra padding. She thought it was a great plan!

I kept cracking up at the shape of her tush every time I looked at it. So funny. So cute. Such a free spirit.

Dancing

It is so totally cool when you realize your baby understands what you're saying. Just the day before yesterday she was in my womb. And yesterday she was only a newborn. How can she now understand what we're saying??

I actually thought she was having seizures. No lie. But Andy informed me that it was dancing I was mistaking for a medical condition. I have always been a bit fearful of something going wrong with this sweet pea but I swear it looked like a seizure to me. As she began to seize more and more frequently I started to relax and believe Andy that Ella was indeed dancing. The icing on the cake was when I said, "Are you dancing?" and she started to "dance". Then, I not only realized she was dancing but I also realized she understood what I was saying! What an awesome moment. I feel a deeper connection with her now that we are starting to communicate.

Here is my sweet girl dancing (while gumming chicken)...

Bugs

We don't kill bugs. We feel all animals, including bugs, have a soul. Andy has always felt this way and over the years I too have come to agree. Therefore Lilly thinks bugs are cool and she does not fear them in any way.

So it was no surprise when Lilly found a small bug on our floor and a crumb and tried to feed the bug the crumb. I thought it was very touching.

If you're on your way to visit us, please, don't turn around! We don't have a buggy house. We just choose to release bugs that we find rather than kill them!

Bad Hair Day

*You really have to view these pictures on the actual blog site by clicking on them to make them full screen size. If you don't you will truly be missing out on sweet baby girl's eyes. I double dog dare you...

Somebody had a bad hair day and it wasn't me.

She's just too cute for words. Really. It's a sin how much I love this kid. And my baby girl grew some hair! Enough hair to actually have bed head and a bad hair day. You gotta love that.